Why did God make mums and other questions

30 03 2008

REAL Answers given by 2nd grade school children to the following questions!!  
Why did God make mothers?  
1. She’s the only one who knows where the sticky tape is.
2. Mostly to clean the house.
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.

How did God make mothers?
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring
3. God made my Mum just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.
 
What ingredients are mothers made of?
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
2. They had to get their start from men’s bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.
 
Why did God give you your mother & not some other Mum?
1. We’re related
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people’s mums like me.
 
What kind of little girl was your mum?
1. My mum has always been my mum and none of that other stuff.
2. I don’t know because I wasn’t there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
3. They say she used to be nice.
 
What did mum need to know about dad before she married him?
1. His last name.
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?
 
Why did your Mum marry your dad?
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mum eats a lot.
2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
3. My grandma says that Mum didn’t have her thinking cap on.
 
Who’s the boss at your house?
1. Mum doesn’t want to be boss, but she has to because dad’s such a clot.
2. Mum. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
3. I guess Mum is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.
 
What’s the difference between mums & dads?
1. Mums work at work and work at home & dads just go to work at work.
2. Mums know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power ’cause that’s who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend’s.
4. Mums have magic; they make you feel better without medicine.
 
What does your mum do in her spare time?
1. Mothers don’t do spare time.
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.


What would it take to make your mum perfect?
1. On the inside she’s already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
2. Diet. You know her hair. I’d diet, maybe blue.
 
If you could change one thing about your Mum, what would it be?
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I’d get rid of that.
2. I’d make my Mum smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
  





new gate

29 03 2008

blog-gate-2.jpg

bllog-gate-1.jpg
our 3 dogs are why we need a new gate.
why?
well, our 3 dogs attract a lot of stray male dogs who would stake their “territory” by peeing at our gate – over the years, we’ve re-painted, repaired and re-painted again to no avail – the iron gate just rusted away and started literally dropping off in bits and pieces. 
so finally, we decided to use stainless steel for the frame with wood for the centre to solve future rusting problems.




outing with tony and family

29 03 2008

last thursday we took tony anthony, his wife sarah, and their 2 sons, ethan and jacob out to klcc.  first stop was the skybridge visit. we were given 3D glasses to wear for the presentation. Jacob asked, “are we going to get pop corn too?”

blog-ethan.jpg   Ethan       blog-jacob.jpg Jacob

blog-klcc.jpg

KL from the sky bridge

blog-klcc-1.jpg

blog-klcc-3.jpg

blog-klcc-4.jpg

saw a window cleaner at work. we were told the window cleaning goes on indefinitely. i guess by the time you’ve finished cleaning 88 floors of windows, it’ll be time to start all over again :)

blog-klcc-5.jpg

by the way, their insurance premium is sky high – cos they’re working up in the sky (i know, i know – lame………… but humour me:))

blog-ethan-2.jpg          blog-jacob-2.jpg

  lunch was next but somehow we the children got distracted by the sight of toy city and this was the result…..

jamie kidd, phill, angela (the writer of tony’s books), their children and another lady by the name of helena joined us for lunch with max and his wife, vanessa. the men then took off for their meeting at methodist college while allan, vanessa and I took the families shopping and later, to the wading pool. 

blog-angela.jpg





Tagged at 44………

28 03 2008

i’m 44, he’s 49 = 93…………….. and we got tagged!!!!!! – so is it going to be mine or Allan’s answers – I guess mine la since Allan never really blogs………

 Instructions: Remove ONE question from below, and add in your personal question, make it a total of 20 questions, then tag 8 people in your list, list them out at the end of this post. Notify them in their chat box that he/she has been tagged. Whoever does the tag will have blessings from all.

1. Who is your all-time inspiration?
God……… He’s always there.

2. Have you given your first kiss away?
Of course la – married 22 years oledi!


3. If you were to be stranded on a deserted island, who are the 3 blog buddies you would take with you? Why?
If I’m stranded, then I should not take my best pals cos i should not want them to be stranded with me………..that’s if I’m not selfsh la – but I guess I am…….. so

Uncle Allan – we are best pals – can solve problems together and try to get out together, otherwise, survive together lo. (Actually its silly to have him along because he will probably be the only one who will never stop or give up looking for me )

Andrew Chum – he’s the brains who can do almost anything – so better have him la

Jeff Mun – we need entertainment :)

4. Where is the place that you want to go the most?
Too many places – I’m just greedy

5. If you can have 1 dream to come true, what would it be?
People all over the world will hear and believe in the Lord Jesus Christ.

6. Do you believe in seeing a rainbow after the rain?
Duh…. it happens half of the time, so what’s there not to believe in???

7. What are you afraid to lose the most now?
My children’s first love for Christ.

8. If you win $1 million, what would you do?
Give some away and invest the rest.

9. If you meet someone that you love, would you confess to him/her?
Sigh,….. Like I said, already married 22 years……….

10.List out 3 good points of the person who tagged you.
Ooi Tong - Sincere, Innocent, Helpful

11. What are the requirements that you wish from your other half?
Too late for this kind of list la…………

12. Which type of person do you hate the most?
Hypocrites

13. What is your ambition?
Been there, done that……..too late :)

14. If you have faults, would you rather the people around you point out to you or would you rather they keep quiet?
Tell me, but keep it sweet la

15. What do you think is the most important thing in your life?
God, husband, family (I know its thing and not things ………… but that’s why you should NEVER tag a 44 year old!)

16. Are you a shopaholic or not?
No, I just buy a few in different colours when its the right stuff so that I don’t have to waste time shopping another day. 

17. If you have a chance. Which part of your character you would like to change?
Too many to choose one

18. Whats the last shocking thing you’ve seen or heard?
I’m 44 – nothing shocks me anymore…

I am tagging: NOBODY because I didn’t even finish this tag:)


 





Timothy and food………

26 03 2008
blog-ccf-2.jpg
Every Tuesday, I “crack” my brains to think of what to offer the members of Timothy care group to eat. I want something different.  We’ve tried nasi lemak, coconut sago pudding, “sticky rice”, pancakes oozing with chocolate sauce, fruits, macaroni cheese, laksa Johor, bread with cury, cakes, going to the “mamak” and even a menu of ice cream, ice cream and more ice cream (only a genius like Jee Yann could have thought of that one).  Yesterday I thought of “Chee Cheong Fun”.
On the 8th of April, we will be having a surprise because Davis, has decided to provide the refreshments. In case you don’t know, Davis is one of the few guys who is really passionate about cooking :)
He said “Aunty Veron, since I will finish work with Genki Sushi at the end of March, I will look into the food for the next meeting”
I can only say “YAY!!!!”
Davis, we are looking forward to it:)
btw, if anyone comes up with some great ideas about food, drop your suggestion here.




Brendan’s picture

26 03 2008
blog-brendans-pic.jpg
He’s got the artistic gift from my mum’s side of the family. “He” is Brendan, my cousin’s 7 year old son.  I probably could not have produced this when I was 14!
We visited my aunt and uncle yesterday and I noticed this picture framed up on their wall, went nearer and then was told that their 7 year old grandson had drawn it.  Brendan, I’m amazed at your ability :)




If you want to speed, better have a speedy brain too ………

26 03 2008

Speeding

Raman kutty Nair, a middle aged Indian immigrant in Dallas, Texas bought a brand new convertible Porsche.

He took off down the road and pushed it up to 160 MPH and was enjoying the wind blowing through his (thinning) hair.

“This is great,” he thought and accelerated to an even higher speed.

But when he eventually looked in his rear-view mirror there was a Ford Crown Victoria Police Car behind him, blue lights
flashing.

“I can get away from him with no problem” thought the man and he floored it some more, and flew down the road at over 210 mph to escape being stopped.

Then he thought, what the hell am I doing? “I’m too old for this kind of thing” and pulled over to the side of the road, and waited for the Police car to catch up with him.

The Policeman pulled in behind the Porsche and walked up on the driver’s side.

“Sir, my Shift ends in five minutes and today is Wednesday 22 November a day before Thanksgiving “If you can give me a good reason that I’ve never heard before as to why you were speeding, I’ll let you go.”

The man looked back at the Policeman and said, “Last week my wife ran off with an American Policeman and I thought you were bringing her back.”

The Policeman said, “Have a nice day sir”





Equations and others

24 03 2008

ROMANCE MATHEMATICS

 Smart man + smart woman = romance

Smart man + dumb woman = affair

Dumb man + smart woman = marriage

Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy

 ______________________________

OFFICE ARITHMETIC

Smart boss + smart employee = profit

Smart boss + dumb employee = production

 Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion

Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime

_____________________________

GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

_____________________________

HAPPINESS

To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.

To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.

______________________________

LONGEVITY

Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.

______________________________

PROPENSITY TO CHANGE

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t.

A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change, and she does.

 _____________________________

DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE

A woman has the last word in any argument.

Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

_____________________________

 And finally, this one is sooooooooooo……….. funny!

 

HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED

Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, “You’re next.”

They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.





What if you can’t speak English

24 03 2008

There was a Chinese lady married to an English gentleman and they lived in London. The poor lady was not very proficient in English, but managed somehow to communicate with her husband. The real problem arose whenever she had to shop for groceries.

One day, she went to the butcher and wanted to buy pork legs. She didn’t know how to put forward her request, and in desperation, lifted up her skirt to show her thighs. The butcher got the message and the lady went home with pork legs.
The next day, she needed to get chicken breasts. Again, she didn’t know how to say, and so she unbuttoned her blouse to show the butcher her breast. The lady got what she wanted.
The third day, the poor lady needed to buy sausages. She brought her husband to the store…… so what did she do?
??
??
??
??
??
??
??
??
??
??
??
??
??
??
??
??
??
??
??
??
What are you thinking?
??
??
??
??
??
??
??
??
??
??
??
??
HellOOOooooooOOOooo, her husband speaks English la !!!




Best Drummer of all

23 03 2008